My Fanfic Moment Chapter 10

23 Sep

More Remo and Chiun for your reading pleasure.  Not for the easily offended.

Chapter 10

Diane A. Reah was growing weary of answering questions. This was the one part of her job that she loathed completely– the press junket. After 4 hours of answering the same canned questions with the same canned answers, things could get a little monotonous. Every one of the infotainment news shows was there today. She tried to shake the activities up a little by changing the inflection of her pat answers, but really, it was all rote.

“More like ‘rot,'” thought Di.

For Entertainment Today, she said that working WITH Vinnie was a challenge, but fun, because she loves him.

With Hollywood Outsider, her response was “Working with Vinnie is challenging but fun, BECAUSE I love him.”

She told Extratainment Weekly, “Because I love him, working with Vinnie IS challenging but fun.”

It had been a long day.

It didn’t matter what project she was currently working on, she always had to answer questions about working with Vinnie. Didn’t they realize she was her own woman?

This junket was a little different, though; The mysterious Asian director was a real source of intrigue this time around.

“What’s he like?”

“Is there a language barrier?”

“Had you met him before you took this job?”

“Will we ever get to meet him?”

“I hear he’s really eccentric–are the rumors true?”

It was hard to be even remotely funny answering questions like those, but she had her moment to shine on the last one, “What do you think about the disappearance of all the local paparazzi?”

“The paps are gone? I hadn’t noticed.”

Sadly, this was true.


Remo stood above the stage, watching “the action sequence” unfold below him. Chiun had Vinnie Dorito standing, dressed in a gorilla suit, surrounded by 20 portly women in blue silk kimonos. The villain, a skinny man in a dime-store tiger mask waded through the crowd of women and approached the psuedo-Remo who assumed a clumsy karate stance and then fell down when the tiger raised his arms, shouting “Rooaaarrr!”

A tall handsome Korean man then walked out onto the set, and with one flick of his wrist, the tiger fell, throwing red silk ribbons into the air.

“Cut!” yelled Chiun.

“Oy,” sighed Remo.

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Posted by on September 23, 2008 in fan fiction, fiction, humour, writing


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